Seized by Christ

They are experiencing Christianity as joy and hope, having thus become lovers of Christ.

Tag: faith formation

  • From Donuts to Discipleship: Where My Men’s Group Fits In

    Every Friday at 5:30 in the morning, I gather with several dozen men for That Man is You. It’s not glamorous—we stumble in half-awake, grab coffee and a donut, swap a few jokes, and slowly warm up.

    By 6:00 AM, we’re watching a video on faith, culture, or manhood. Afterward, we break into smaller groups to talk about it—sometimes about the content, sometimes about what’s weighing on our lives. A deacon moderates, keeping us centered on prayer and truth. By 7:00 AM, we’re out the door and off to work.

    On paper, that’s one hour a week. But in reality, it’s much more: it’s an anchor of brotherhood in my week.

    Where It Fits in the “Layered Parish” Model

    I’ve been working on a way to think about relationships in parish life, something I call the Layered Model of Community:

    • Core Sphere (2–5 people): Deep friendship, accountability, prayer partners.
    • Support Sphere (10–15 people): Steady brotherhood and shared life.
    • Community Sphere (50+ people): Wider fellowship—banquets, service projects, parish socials.
    • Mission Sphere (150–500+): The parish or diocese gathered in worship and witness.

    So where does That Man is You land?

    👉 Support Sphere.
    It’s a classic example: small groups of 10–12 men, weekly rhythm, spiritual content, moderated discussion. More than banter, but not intimate enough for every man to share his deepest struggles.

    How It Could Go Deeper

    What makes the Support Sphere strong is that it feeds men consistently. But transformation happens when the Core Sphere grows inside it.

    That could look like:

    • Two or three guys from the group grabbing coffee mid-week.
    • Starting a prayer partnership with one or two men.
    • Checking in outside the meeting—life, struggles, victories.

    In other words: using the Support Sphere as fertile ground for the Core Sphere to take root.

    The Bigger Picture

    That Man is You also stretches upward:

    • As a program, it’s a Community Sphere, connecting dozens of men at the parish level.
    • And it plugs into the Mission Sphere, part of a nationwide movement helping men step up in faith.

    But it’s in those smaller connections—finding your two or three brothers—that the deepest growth happens.

    Because as good as coffee, donuts, and teaching videos are, every man ultimately needs a band of brothers who know him by name and walk with him through life.

    Developed with assistance from ChatGPT-5

  • A Framework for Layered Relationships in Parish Life

    Most people want deeper community, but they’re already stretched thin. That’s why so many parish groups stall: they ask for more time without offering more meaning. The key is layering relationships so that each level has a purpose, fits modern life, and feeds the others.

    Here’s a practical model that any parish can adopt.

    1. Core Sphere (2–5 people)

    Purpose: Deep accountability, spiritual friendship, honest talk.
    Time: 30–60 minutes weekly.
    Content: Confide struggles, pray for one another, encourage growth.
    Example: Two men who meet for prayer once a week, or a group of 3–5 who connect after a parish project to check in about life and faith.

    👉 This is where the real transformation happens. Think of it as spiritual oxygen—you can’t live without it.

    2. Support Sphere (10–15 people)

    Purpose: A steady circle of brothers (or sisters) who share life together.
    Time: 1–2 hours monthly.
    Content: Shared meals, faith discussions, service projects, study, or retreats.
    Example: A small parish fraternity, or a sub-group of men who choose to meet outside of regular meetings.

    👉 This group makes sure no one drifts off alone.

    3. Community Sphere (50+ people)

    Purpose: Broader fellowship and a sense of shared mission.
    Time: A few hours per month, often tied to service or parish-wide gatherings.
    Content: Banquets, festivals, fish fries, service drives, seasonal events.
    Example: The men’s group, the Knights council, or a parish ministry cluster.

    👉 This is the visible life of the parish—but without Spheres 1 & 2, it risks staying shallow.

    4. Mission Sphere (150–500+)

    Purpose: The whole parish or diocese united in worship and mission.
    Time: Weekly Mass, feast days, diocesan events.
    Content: Preaching, sacraments, communal witness.
    Example: The parish gathered at Sunday liturgy, or the wider diocese.

    👉 This is where faith becomes public—but it must be fed by the smaller circles above.

    Why This Works

    • Realistic: Nobody can give 30 minutes a week to 150 people. But they can give 30–60 minutes to a handful, and a few hours to others on rotation.
    • Scalable: The parish doesn’t need to invent new structures—it just needs to layer what already exists.
    • Purpose-driven: Each sphere has a clear reason to exist, not just “another meeting.”

    Practical Action Plan

    • Start with Core Spheres
      • Encourage prayer partnerships or triads.
      • Make it normal for men to check in about life—not just tasks.
    • Form Support Spheres
      • Identify natural clusters (5–10 who already get along).
      • Invite them to gather monthly for a meal + prayer or reflection.
    • Strengthen the Community Sphere
      • Keep projects and banquets, but tie them back to smaller groups.
      • Example: after a service project, small teams pray or debrief together.
    • Integrate with the Mission Sphere
      • Root everything in the Eucharist and parish mission.
      • Celebrate parish-wide what the smaller groups are doing, so it all feels connected.

    ✨ In other words:

    • Mission Sphere = parish identity.
    • Community Sphere = belonging.
    • Support Sphere = brotherhood.
    • Core Sphere = deep friendship.

    Each level feeds the next. Together, they make “walking with every man” not only possible—but natural.

    Developed with assistance from ChatGPT-5

  • Why Small Groups Are Essential for Parish Life

    As parish leaders, we often think about programs, Mass attendance, and committees. But the real work of forming disciples doesn’t happen in crowds — it happens in small, intentional circles where people know one another and hold each other accountable.

    Human beings are wired for connection, but only up to a point. Research shows that most of us can maintain about 150 meaningful relationships — and even that requires focused attention. Relationships need time, shared experience, and trust.

    This is why microsphere relationships — those weekly, intentional, small-group connections — are so important in parish life:

    • They cultivate trust and accountability. People grow in faith when they can share struggles and victories with others who care.
    • They encourage retention and engagement. Parishioners who belong to small groups are less likely to drift away and more likely to participate actively.
    • They support spiritual formation. Programs and Masses teach, but it’s in close relationships that people practice faith, pray together, and live it out.

    Contrast this with the “macro” level — large committees, social events, or general gatherings. These are important for information and community awareness, but they rarely produce the depth of connection needed for discipleship.

    As leaders, our task is not just to manage the parish but to create spaces where spiritual growth is natural and relational. Microsphere groups — small sharing, prayer, or accountability circles — are the most effective way to do this. They are the places where faith is tested, strengthened, and lived out.

    Practical Steps for Leaders:

    1. Identify parishioners who could benefit from small groups.
    2. Provide guidance, not micromanagement, so groups form naturally around shared interests or life stages.
    3. Encourage leaders within these groups, offering support and training for facilitation.
    4. Celebrate and highlight the successes of these groups to show the parish the value of deep connection.

    Reflection for Leaders:
     If our parish is to thrive, how can we move beyond surface-level engagement and ensure that every parishioner has a meaningful, accountable, and nurturing connection?

    Written with assistance from ChatGPT-5